Back in the thick of it, again

I had to meet with my human resource liaison yesterday who offered me several folders of information to read in my spare time and who walked me through investments, retirement, insurance, and saving for a rainy day. The good news from all of this is that I was able to sign my sisters up as beneficiaries, making my worth to them more lucrative. If I simply was to perish, they'd be better off. Hmmm. Funny how fast Cynde responded with her information. Even so, to be fair, KC will get half. The way I see it, one of them can have my dilapidated old car and the other one can worry about my house that needs to be sold.

As we talked, I realized that my retiring age will be 70 years old because I changed gears after ten years of teaching in Kentucky. Yuck. At 70, I can't imagine how sick of work I'll be. I always envisioned myself in a retirement community by then cleaning pools and giving back rubs to hot, wrinkled old ladies with rolls of fat pouring out of their bikinis. So much for that dream. Not even a Margarita or need for Cialis.

Seriously. I wish I could say that I've made any decision in my life for financial reasons. Hell, if I did this, I would NEVER have left teaching to work on a Ph.D. I'd be doing alright and could retire a lot sooner. In fact, I'd be able to retire and start a new career then. Ah, but there's no looking back and I still have investments and some retirement there (although not much). (This coming from the guy who turned down a banking job so he could work for minimum wage at a home for adult men with disabilities...at times, I don't even make sense to myself).

While filling out the paper work, the liaison told me how many in the corporate world are now returning to education because their jobs are at risk and they crave stability. Unbelievable. As if there's much more stability in the public sector...doesn't the public rely on the wealth of the private to function publicly anyway? That would be my guess. I'm not sure if anything is stable anymore.

And so, in a month or so, I will once again be insured and taxed to death, wondering where my income really is going. It obviously won't be invested in the salaries of Connecticut DMV employees. They are shutting down services, and will have to rely on fewer to help more, causing an even more stressful environment than the toxic one that already exists.

It makes me wonder if having a career is just another mythology we fool ourselves into believing. At the moment, I don't know. But I will still watch The Apprentice and fantasize that I live a more luxurious life of greed. If we couldn't have wishful thinking, we wouldn't be American.